Blog 7.1 - The Incredible Shrinking Zigzag Wanderer
- Steve Kimberley
- Sep 22, 2024
- 11 min read
May 29th 2024
Note: Per the above date, I started this blog at the end of May, intending to publish. And here we are nearing the end of September. Since starting it, several things have changed for both of us, mostly health- and injury-related, so it never happened. (The 'milky' vision in the right eye was not corrected by cataract surgery BTW, which is a bugger to say the least).
However, here it is. There's very little travel involved, and consequently little in the way of photography.
Sorry!
One more thing; this will probably be the final blog on this platform, and assuming we recommence travelling next Spring as tentatively planned, any further blogs will be published on a different platform.
Steve
Selling the Ducato/Weinsberg van was a wrench, there's no doubt about it. However, we do need to be pragmatic about things, and in some ways it's been a good, refreshing change.
We spent a few days in one of our favourite parts of the country, near Buxton, a couple of weeks ago, and while the weather wasn't always ideal for tent camping, it was still a very enjoyable break.
If you don't know, we were recently adopted by a hound-dog called Lacy, and as much as anything, this was a test to see how she would cope with the process of camping in general, and living under canvas in particular.
Axis Alliance on guard*
I'm pleased to report that all was absolutely fine.
Given that Lacy spent much of her young life (she's about 22 months old) in a cage in Cyprus, we just weren't sure how she'd take to it, but she was like a duck to water, happily.
Us two, Admin and yrs trly, however were rather less enamoured.
While we both still love tent camping - we've done it for a combined total of approaching ninety years (scary thought) between us, we have to admit - or to be more truthful - I have to admit that, in my early seventies, it's a little more taxing than it used to be.
It's not the bit between setting up and breaking down camp; I still love that bit. It's more the bookends of the trip. This time we had to set up a brand new untested tent in a howling wind on a Peak District hillside, and that's really not fun. And then it started raining, hard, which found a few new-tent leaks (which were admittedly very easily sorted with the application of a few dollops of seam sealer).
The last morning, when we had to pack up, was much calmer, and fortunately dry, contrary to the forecast, so the worst fears were not realised. However, it's still quite hard work fitting everything in the car. And of course it doesn't stop there as it all has to be unpacked at home and groundsheets (footprints) and tent thoroughly cleaned where necessary and then hung to dry.
Bone dry.
If you've ever unpacked a tent that has been repacked and put away with the slightest dampness in it you'll understand.
Not nice.
Anyway, as alluded to, the break was really very good - between the showers. We had lovely pub lunches in Bakewell (The Wheatsheaf) and Foolow (Bull's Head, both pubs being dog-friendly and highly recommended by Lacy), and a very enjoyable wander around Buxton and its beautiful park.
We'll be back; maybe just not with a tent.
Which brings me to... the incredible shrinking Zigzag Wanderer.
The first iteration was of course our Fiat-based motorhome; nearly seven metres long, and tall and wide with it. Yes, of course it was somewhat roomy and relatively comfortable, and with the upgraded electrics and so on, we could go almost anywhere without having to rely on campsites. All that, I miss. What I don't miss though, is the flipside of all that; struggling to park in car parks, on streets, and smaller lay-bys etc, and often not even being able to fit under barriers - even three-metre high ones!
The other very important issue as it turned out, was Admin's reticence to drive the thing given that it had a manual transmission which would be no fun over any kind of distance with her crook knees.
This becomes even more of a thing, as with my eye issues I really need someone to take the wheel occasionally.
(To explain: I normally have no problem seeing totally clearly. However, some mornings I wake up with slightly blurry vision in my 'good', left eye, which makes driving a bit less comfortable. So the availability of a co-pilot is a boon. Advanced Glaucoma is never going away either, although the cataracts might).
I wouldn't want us to get stuck in the depths of continental Europe, unable to drive to the ferry or whatever.
So, if we're to keep up Zigzag Wandering, without the constraints of a tent, there was only one viable option.
A small campervan.
Enter the Alphard.
If you know, you know, but I doubt all that many people do. So to explain, an Alphard is a Toyota MPV, which has been available in the Land of the Rising Yen for around 22 years (in three iterations, although all three are basically the same thing - just being subject to facelifts), but never officially imported into the UK.
It has a 2.4 litre four-cylinder petrol mill in our case, but bigger V6 engines are also available, and all come with auto transmissions.
It's under five metres in length so can fit the average car park space, and even more importantly, can sneak under a two metre height barrier. Perfick.
Anyway, finding a suitable example meant the usual trawling of the web and Farcebook, joining a few Alphard groups on the latter, and asking the question re. the various campervan converters who specialise in the marque. It didn't take long before someone - Graham - popped up with a photo of his, saying it was for sale.
It looked good too, so I called him and we had a very long and wide-ranging chat. What a smashing chap he turned out to be. Very informative, and totally honest (It's easy enough to spot the charlatans).
So, we arranged to view at his home in the Norfolk Broads, spent a lot of time going over the car thoroughly, taking a long test drive, and also drinking coffee and eating caramel chocolate biscuits (he probably had us at caramel chocolate biscuits to be fair...).
I managed to knock £400 off the asking price, Admin sorted the excise duty and insurance, and we were the owners of a black metallic 2006 Toyota Alphard, converted by All Seasons in Newcastle.
We'd already decided that, should we purchase, we'd stay overnight in Norfolk to avoid another three and a half hour trip back home, and headed west to Necton (south east of Kings Lynn) and the Claypit Farm CS.
It's peaceful, and has nice views across open countryside - and Muntjac, and hares - and at twenty knicker including electric hook-up, not too pricey.
At Claypit Farm
And the sunset over the church's wooden spire and the barley fields wasn't too bad either.
The consensus was that we'd use it again for an overnight stop, or possibly two nights.
There was a nearby garage on the A47, with an Asda convenience store, so we managed to get some milk and something rudimentary for dinner, and coffees from the Costa machine within.
The food was neither here nor there, but filled a hole (which was large, having only had a banana and a granola bar all day) I suppose.
Lacy was walked, fortunately not spotting any hares, and before too long it was time to test the bed.
And there's one of the downsides. I'd never slept in a 'rock and roll' bed before, and to say it's tight on space is certainly accurate.
I didn't sleep too well, and I don't think admin did either, but we coped, and I think we'll adapt.
We'd better!
The other downside, for me, is the rather compact driving position, due mainly to the restricted movement of the driver's seat back because of the worktop and sink behind it.
It's slightly annoying, as the converter could have made the worktop in particular two or three inches shorter, which would make all the difference. Maybe I'll have to have a think, modification-wise...
However, I'm sure Admin will find it perfectly acceptable, which means maybe I'll just have to be 'Admin' myself a bit more often - even if my name doesn't anagram anything like hers does!
That'll suit me though, I'm sure.
13th June: A week or two on, now, and a few things have occurred.
Firstly, I've booked the Alphard into Dream Ice in Hinckley for a bit of work. They're an established local company. The major part of the work is installing an Alpine Apple carplay/Android head unit to replace the current not very well-specified Kenwood cd/radio unit. While they're at that, they'll also install a Wolfbox camera system with two front and two rear cameras, giving reversing camera function and rear-view (via a replacement interior 'mirror'). One of the two front-facing cameras will constantly monitor and record the view ahead to a SD card, while the other will give a decent low view for parking.
They'll also delete or at least quieten the annoying reverse selector position bleep, which is way too loud and completely overpowers the beeps of the reversing sensors.
Finally, they'll modify the furniture behind the driver's seat (they also do campervan conversions btw, so this is well within their skill-set) to enable the seat to go back a bit further on its tracks, and also recline a bit more - which should considerably improve the driving position for me. This is all booked in for early July, sadly too late for our first week's camping in Suffolk, but it couldn't be done any earlier, unfortunately.
Can't wait though.
Meanwhile, I've somehow managed to fix an irksome fault.
I've no idea how.
For some odd reason the driver-side rear drop-glass wouldn't open from either control switch. I checked with the original converter of the van to see if they had disabled it (it's right by the gas hob, so feasible I guess), but no, they hadn't.
So, I tried multiple button press combinations hoping for some kind of miraculous 'reset', keen to avoid having to delve into door switchpacks - particularly the rear one as that would require removal of the door. And, somehow, it started working. Oh joy!
The next thing was to polish the headlamps. Inevitably, these had age-yellowed, so looked rather naff. I picked up a 3M polishing kit (a small drill arbor with a selection of sanding discs in various fine grades, plus a foam polishing mop and compound).
A first pass on one of them has definitely improved matters, but I'm sure can still be improved on, so that's something to carry on with - mañana.
Next job was to install a tracker, of the same make and model (Streetwize) as those I used in the Fiat and in the Kia. They're cheap to buy, and cheap to run using a 1p Mobile sim (on EE) and no subscription, and have proved to be utterly reliable. Why pay more? Incidentally the route maps I use in this series of blogs are generated by the tracker and displayed on the app as required.
The only issue was finding a permanently-live feed for both it and the two pairs of USB sockets I've also installed, as I didn’t want to have it under the bonnet and running off the vehicle battery. Eventually I decided on the permanent feed from the leisure battery to the fridge. Routing the cables to all three items proved a slight challenge, but I got there.
Admin bought a 'drive-away' Kampa Action awning the other day, which is nice. One issue, though, the van doesn't have an awning rail, and it's not obvious how one can be installed. There's a very limited amount of (not enough) space between the pop-top's hinge and the edge of the roof. My plan was to bond and screw one on so that is hidden away when the pop-top is in its lowered position, but there's just not room, so I'll just have to keep scratching my head until I find a way.
Meanwhile, yesterday (17th June) we arrived at Bailiff's Cottage near Woodbridge, Suffolk. We don't do too many campsites, and tend to be selective in that they have to be small and quiet (so preferably adult-only). If they have electric hook-up, that's a plus at least until we've upgraded the battery and charging provisions in the van. So this place is ideal. We came here five years ago and loved it, vowing to return soon, but then Covid hit, then we spent much of the next couple of years abroad with the big van.
It hasn't changed one jot.
The owners, Sandie and Graham, ageing somewhat now, are still lovely, the facilities are also ageing commensurately - but are more than adequate, there are electric hook-ups, and only five units are allowed at any one time (one or two tents may sometimes also be found among the trees too, but thus far there are none). In fact, there's just the one other unit here so far, a caravan occupied by an Essex couple with a grumpy Scottie, so it's almost idyllic.
I assume that the property, which is in the middle of nowhere and served by a very quiet lane, was once run as a nursery given the several poly-tunnels, greenhouses, fruit trees etc, and is set on a very large rambling plot that you're free to explore (not that I'd presume to wander through the private garden that surrounds the house, but it would be easy to find yourself in there accidentaly. Ahem).
I guess they have found it hard to fully shed their previous life too, as plants are usually available to purchase, and our own back garden is testament to that having bought a couple of small pots the last time. One of which, a Lysimachia Firecracker, has pretty much taken over a couple of beds, while the other, a Rudbeckia Californica, gave good service until last year but has failed/been badly slug-chewed so far this summer. I've already arranged to buy at least one new one to take home.
Or probably two.
Amazingly, the weather has been good here, given the very poor summer so far. Yesterday was lovely and warm and sunny, as was this morning. A little cloud has now painted the sky, cooling things down, but it's still pleasant enough to sit outside. The rest of the week looks set fair too, with the slight chance of the odd shower. Hardly a heatwave, but it makes us both happy.
Anyway, as is obvious from the photos, we managed to jury-rig the awning. Erecting it as a free-standing 'tent' is no problem. It just pegs and guys in place as you might expect. The problem was attaching the connection tunnel to the van, and was overcome (after a fashion) with the use of (very) strong magnets. It does the job for now, bearing in mind that the main awning is well secured to mother earth, and it's just a small section of tent fabric being anchored.
And those magnets are, as I said, strong. I have a blood blister on a finger to prove it where two of them decided to be instantly attracted to one another...
It'll do for now.
Another gratuitous sunset picture. This time here at Bailiff's Cottage.
Harking back to the head unit/ rear view camera install/ furniture mods - let's just say that it was a real saga stretching over several weeks (well over a month really). I'm not going into it all, but I'll just say - think carefully how and where you spend your hard-earned.
And no, I'm still not happy with certain things, but I've had enough now, so will just roll with it and add it to the Bank of Experience account.
All (well, most of) the above was written quite a while back, and I've sat on it, not knowing whether to bother publishing, as
A) It's pretty boring content, and
B) I couldn't see anyone being remotely interested.
Still, I've done it now - so there!
*Lacy has been DNA-checked. It turns out that her mum was/is a Segugio Italiano (a scent hound type), and her dad a German Shepherd. Axis Alliance...Think about it...
(Oddly enough, she apparently also has 4% Chihuahua genes... The mind boggles).
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